Welcome, hello, happy Wednesday!

We made it!

This newsletter was supposed to go out this morning, but if you were following along on IG, you know tinyletter put me in purgatory. Well, here we go...

Hello and welcome to my first newsletter! When I told my fiancée (or Bae, as she is known on the internet) that I was creating a newsletter, she was supportive and suggested I do it monthly because “not that much happens in our lives right now.” Well, babe, a lot happens in my head! As of now, I plan to send weekly - likely on Tuesdays (I'll explain why on a Tuesday), but I’m excited about getting started, so here we are.

Happy Black history month! One of my favorite (small and easy) ways to celebrate is to call in/out blogs/companies/websites that try to honor Black history month by celebrating “people of color.” Luckily I haven’t seen much of this yet this year but it’s still early. 👀 It’s okay - and NECESSARY - to specifically honor Black people and the many, many, many contributions of the Black community. Saying “Black” when you mean Black, instead of using “people of color,” is something I had to learn early on as I built up my fluency in talking about race. Specificity matters!

Books, Books, Books

• Currently reading: Did I impulse purchase a 6 pack of The Mediator novels by Meg Cabot off eBay? I’m all about finding joy in this panoramic*, and rereading a series I loved as a young adult is absolutely the delight I’m after. I’m currently rereading the first book, Shadowland, and excited to see where it goes.

• Recent favorite: Warrior Poet: A Biography of Audre Lorde by Alexis De Veaux was life giving. Audre Lorde is one of my favorite poets and thinkers. I read her The Collected Poems and Sister Outsider early in my 20s, and they shaped who I am today. Warrior Poet is a fascinating, engaging biography that shows Audre in all her flaws and glory, and a reading experience that reminds me why I read.

• Backlist book recs (I shamelessly stole this segment from Sarah’s (@BookishandBlack) Patreon - subscribe here!):

  • The Fact of a Body by Alex Marzano-Leznevitch is a book I’ve thought about regularly since reading in 2017. Part memoir, part true crime, HBO recently picked this up and I’m excited to see what they do with it. Trigger warning for child sexual abuse.

  • White Negroes: When Cornrows Were in Vogue… and Other Thoguhts on Cultural Appropriation by Lauren Michele Jackson will completely ruin TikTok for you because all you’ll be able to see is Digital Blackface - but in an absolutely necessary way. Jackson is so brilliant and writes about the way white people are obsessed with Black culture in a way that is both incisive and nuanced.

• Preorder corner: You can preorder Clint Smith’s How The World is Passed (June 2021) at Loyalty for a signed copy here.

Note: All of these links (w/ exception of Clint Smith) are to my Bookshop.org affiliate, of which I receive a small commission. I also encourage you to shop from your favorite indie (or one of mine) or check your local library.

*I really tried to find the original video of the first Black woman I saw coining (at least in my mind) calling the pandemic anything that starts with a P, but. If anyone has it, please send to me so I can cite this person with all the gratitude they’re due!

Self Care

Today’s self care topic is negative self-talk and the lies we tell ourselves. Recently, I was talking with Bae about how I hate working from home because “I struggle so much with focus - even at the office.”

She completely shattered my life by responding, “Allison, you always say that about yourself but I’ve never seen you struggle with focus.”

I stopped and thought: Is my focus problem actually true, or is this just a lie I tell myself? “Bad at focus” is how I’ve considered myself since college, if not earlier. After that moment, I’ve stopped thinking “I’m bad at focusing”, and my productivity, sense of self at work - and yes, my focus - have improved drastically. I’m grateful I have a partner who can point out negative self-talk, and I hope you have someone like that too - whether it be a friend, family member, colleague, therapist, me(!!!), or even just yourself.

Of course, framing isn’t everything - I don’t mean to diminish mental health conditions that can be chemical and are never the fault of an individual. This is a small reframe that’s having a big impact in my life lately. And if you can’t stop talking shit about yourself, I encourage you to try saying more kind things about yourself instead. 

Community Care

This is a section where I’ll highlight mutual aid or other opportunities to get involved & show up for each other. While I can’t promise to share every single link, if you ever have a need, please send it to me for inclusion in the newsletter.

• Laal Mental Health Fundraiser: My friend Fatima is involved with LaalNYC and they just extended the campaign for two more weeks, so please give if you are able and support the mental health of Bengali immigrant women. Quick storytime: I met Fatima my final semester of college. She was a sophomore, and we got involved in so many of the same student orgs that we quickly started spending every day together. Working with her was a highlight of my college experience. I say that to mean: anything Fatima is involved with I support wholeheartedly. She gets shit done and is so thoughtful & generous with her work.

• StopAAPIHate.org: I stand with the AAPI community against the wave of hate crimes they’ve been experiencing, intensified by COVID-19 and government scapegoating, particularly lately against elders in the Bay Area. Stop AAPI Hate gives you a place to report hate crimes, and links to articles & news to stay informed.

Small Biz Spotlight

I love spending money & shopping small! Here are some small business I’ve bought items from recently or plan to soon. Check out my beautiful friend Kaci rocking her Myla Makes gold viola earrings.

• MylaMakesStuff: Myla is a Black & Vietnamese creator based in Baltimore who makes absolutely gorgeous, affordable jewelry and hair clips with dried flowers, creativity and thoughtfulness. I now own 3 of her earrings - they’re lightweight and dress up my sweats! She does product drops every couple of weeks and you can follow her IG or subscribe to her newsletter for more info. I also love how open she is about her process & how she manages her workload as a creative with ADHD - not accepting too many custom orders, working with noise cancelling headphones, etc. She also gives a percentage of all her proceeds to mutual aids. Myla is a true gem.

• Gaian: I recently found this jewelry thanks to Districtly Local. It’s a Black woman owned business operated out of Capitol Hill in D.C. and I can’t wait to buy the Femme and Power earrings.

Slice of Life

Max is thrilled the days are getting longer because it means less walks in his nemesis, the light-up harness.

Thank you to my copyeditor Ellen! All typos my own.

And with that, I'm closing out with a poem. Have a great day!

With love,
Allison

p.s. I want this newsletter to be interactive! Let me know what you think, either by emailing me back or sharing your thoughts on IG & tagging me. :)