Vol. 31: Pursuing peace in 2022

Author

Allison Punch
January 11, 2022

Vol. 31: Pursuing peace in 2022

I’m currently writing this on a rainy Sunday afternoon with what could be a hangover from beers consumed last night, or could be a continuation of the tension headache I’ve been experiencing on and off for the past week. By the time you’re receiving this newsletter Tuesday morning, I’ll have been back to work for exactly one day after a very blissful three weeks off. It was a gigantic privilege to have this time to unplug, celebrate Christmas with my family and reconnect with my wife. I’m also deeply dreading returning to work.

My anxiety mostly manifests in chest tightness and shortness of breath. Some days I feel like it’s impossible to catch my breath. In summer 2020, I was experiencing this daily; I was in a bad place and my relationship was struggling because of it. Through Amber Burns’s journaling challenge, I had a breakthrough: In some ways, I was choosing to be miserable. 

There’s both systemic and medical causes behind anxiety that I can’t begin to account for the many complexities, and am only speaking from my experience. I found that if I did 15 minutes of yoga and 10 minutes of journaling daily, my chest tightness decreased, often to the point of being nonexistent. When I acknowledged this within myself, I also had to accept that by not practicing this 25 minutes of self care a day, I was telling myself that I deserved to be miserable. I do not. I deserve to be happy and at peace. I maintained these practices until we got a dog in September and I reestablished different self care routines that center around his care.

This is the energy I’m bringing into 2022: I deserve to be happy and at peace. You do, too. For me, working out two or three times a week and sticking to no more than two hours a day of social media screen time really helps keep my anxiety manageable. For you, it will probably be different but if you’re struggling to motivate yourself to do whatever brings you peace, please remember that you do not deserve to be miserable.

Books, books, books

Recent reads

  • This Boy We Made: A Memoir of Motherhood, Genetics and Facing the Unknown by Taylor Harris comes out today and I read an early copy thanks to Catapult. I raced through this memoir in three days. It’s the story of her experience mothering a medically complex child and navigating the healthcare system as a Black mother. I felt so seen and validated by how she describes coping with anxiety when your greatest fears become a possibility. For Harris, this is in relation to her own health and her son’s health, but as someone who also has lots of health anxiety, the COVID-19 pandemic has brought up a lot of “is this an irrational anxiety or is this an actual possibility?” I highly recommend this book and thanks to Nicole for putting it on mine (and so many others!) radar. 

  • One of Us is Lying by Karen McManus has received a lot of hype over the years and it was Leonor that finally convinced me to impulse purchase this. I read it in two days over Christmas. I love a teen murder mystery and this delivered exactly what I needed.

  • Becoming Abolitionists: Police, Protests, and the Pursuit of Freedom was my first finished read of 2022, though I started it back in November. I cannot recommend this book enough: for Derecka Purnell’s intellectual and activist journey into abolition, and her clear analysis of so many different issues we face on our climate, from disability to climate justice (did you know Harriet Tubman was disabled?! I did not), how policing upholds injustice and what we can do to build towards an abolitionist future. At times, this book was very hard to read because our society has so many terrifying problems, but she also offers hope and a path forward.

Currently reading

  • I picked up my first Project Book read of 2022: the 650 page Let the Record Show: A Political History of ACT UP New York, 1987 - 1993 by Sarah Schulman. I love reading about movements and I love reading queer history, so I’m really enjoying this. She does an excellent job capturing the nuances of ACT UP and the variety of experiences from those she interviewed for the book, and it makes me emotional 

  • I have a couple hours left of Sesali Bowen’s Bad Fat Black Girl: Notes from a Trap Feminist which I’m listening to on audio thanks to Libro.Fm (that is an affiliate link and this audio was gifted). I love Bowen’s narration and this book is fascinating. Highly recommend!

Backlist book recs

  • If you’re trying to get back into reading in the new year, might I recommend YA or romance? One of my favorite teen murder mysteries is Let Me Hear a Rhyme by Tiffany D. Jackson, a love letter to hip-hop culture of the 90s that also features an amazing portrayal of pre-gentrification Brooklyn. For romance novels, I cannot recommend Adriana Herrera’s American Dreamer series enough. Book one is my favorite!

Preorder corner

Note: All of these links are to my Bookshop.org affiliate. Shopping affiliate links supports my work at no extra cost to you. I also encourage you to shop from your favorite indie (or one of mine) or check your local library.

Self Care 

My self care for the month of January is to schedule all the appointments I need to: Dentist, physical, annual well woman exam. Self care is not always sexy, and I haven’t actually been to the doctor or the dentist since… January 2020. Yikes.

I also have been returning to this yoga video in the morning and sleeping with peppermint oil in the diffuser to combat my jaw pain. Part of returning to the dentist will be finally getting a new night guard. I got rid of mine in 2019 because I “didn’t need it anymore.” LMFAO If only I knew… 

Community Care


I gave blood for the first time ever last week, and it was an extremely positive experience, despite my nerves. There is currently a nationwide shortage of blood, and many antiquated (frankly, homophobic and biphobic) rules still exist around donation. If you are eligible and have time off and transport, I strongly encourage you to make an appointment! I received 7 blood transfusions in 2015 and am terrified to think what would have happened to me if that blood wasn’t available.Find a place to donate here.

By now, you have probably seen infographics of news articles asking you to upgrade your mask to an kn95 or n95 mask to better protect yourself and others from the omicron variant. I’ve been wearing kn95s since the Delta variant; I love the way they fit, I feel very protected, and because I’m not working in person, I’m able to reuse them many times. Please upgrade your mask to keep your community safe. I posted this on IG but didn’t get any responses (yet), but if you’re an in person worker (retail, healthcare, education, etc) who is struggling to afford upgraded masks, please send me your venmo/cashapp/paypal info and I would love to include you in a future newsletter to keep you protected.

And finally, Silver Spring Justice Coalition is currently crowdfunding to support a mural honoring those killed by police in Montgomery County, Maryland (my current home). Learn more here and donate via SSJC's paypal with "mural" in the comments.

That’s all, folks

I’m not gonna lie, the past 3 weeks have been restorative in so many ways and I’m terrified of losing my coping mechanisms as soon as I return to the stress of my day job. Thank you always for reading and engaging in my newsletter. Next month will mark ONE YEAR since I launched Allison Reads & Writes and it has been such a gratifying creative and connection outlet.

I’m hoping to hit 1,000 subscribers around my one year anniversary so if you enjoy my writing, please forward and share it with friends!